Well, it’s the weekend again and for most of us single girls that means hitting a few bars. Not that bars are the best places to meet guys, but what else are you going to do? It’s funny, I once got into a conversation with my doctor about where to meet men. It went something like this:
DR: You shouldn’t date men you meet in bars.
ME: I’m a twenty five year old woman. Where else should I meet them?
DR: Some people meet men at school.
ME: I’m not in school.
DR: Well, how about work?
ME: I take care of a seven-month old kid. I might meet a lot of moms and nannies, but not a whole lot of men. Trust me, nothing brings the boys a-running like a car seat in the back of my car. And usually, if we were to pass in the park, they assume that he is my child. Again, another great pick-up tactic.
DR: Well, what about single dads?
ME: I have no problem dating men with kids but usually I get so attached to the kids that I feel bad breaking up till the relationship is way past over.
DR: Take a class.
ME: No offense, but usually the only people who take classes at my age are women who think they can meet men.
DR: How about your hobbies?
ME: I’m a writer. It doesn’t get much more solitary than that. So, you see, now we are back to bars.

I’m not saying that it’s impossible to meet men outside of bars. There’s the beach in the summer, coffee shops, random greetings on the street or friends of friends. But it just seems that if you want a large group of men in a small space, you go to a bar. Of course, my best friend and i have made a pact never to date a “bar boy” again. Not all men that you meet in bars are “bar boys.” “Bar boys” are clearly at the bar to get laid. If you have a one-night stand with a guy, he is a “bar boy.” If he works at a bar, chance are he’s a “bar boy.” If you’ve seen him at the same bar every weekend, sitting in the same spot, always hitting on a girl and probably using the same pick up line…He’s definitely a “bar boy.” Such boys serve their purpose–a few free drinks, some making out, casual sex. But they are not relationship material and should never be treated as such. But if a man asks for your number, genuinely shows an interest in you, not in taking you home for the night, he might not be a “bar boy”…but I’d still have my guard up. He may just know how to throw you off the scent!

Bevin wrote this on April 29th, 2005 and filed it under Single Life |