When meeting people on dating sites or anywhere on the internet, some build a fantasy so vivid from seeing only a picture, no one could live up to it. Instead of carefully paying attention to what the profile states, what the person says in correspondence, they dismiss it and create the person in the way they want them to be. This can surely backfire since it’s rare anyone will meet a fantasized expectation.

The person who tends to create these fantasies often is the type that can never be satisfied because they don’t live in reality - online or otherwise. I’ve encountered the fantasizer, personally. They see a picture and begin to focus on that one picture and the fantasy begins. It becomes the focus of conversation and anything realistic becomes secondary, if not totally ignored. When I say I’m overweight, they don’t believe me. When I say I color my hair or otherwise I would look like their grandma, they don’t take me seriously. They insist my breasts must be perky. How they can determine that from a head shot is beyond me!

I feel it’s possible to find the person who is right for you on the internet with patience, caution and good judgment. But, when one superimposes a fantasy upon another, they may never step out of that fantasy and into reality. Beware of the fantasizer. They may pull you into a dream world that the real you, isn’t part of.

Kathy wrote this on April 17th, 2008 and filed it under Internet Dating |