So, while I am still single from the past, most of my friends that got married during that time are now experiencing what I like to refer to as the 5 year turn around. Meaning that most of them are starting to go through divorces. I used to have a saying that I would catch the guy the 2nd time around, but seriously… I was just kidding! More than that, I’m seeing a lot of women who have been married for 20 years that are also my friends, going through the same drop off, where one is just deciding to leave.

I have my thoughts of why this is happening… some were just bad marriages that should have never happened, where the individuals got lost in lust. Others, I believe, is that the idea of marriage as an institution is completely reversing and breaking down. Women have gained power, men have become confused over it and a lot of people have to awaken to themselves in order to actually be in a marriage.

So, that’s a side note. What I actually wanted to say is this…. I’ve been disturbed by the reactions that I get from friends when they start going through the divorce process. Their worst fear? Being single again and being afraid that they will be single forever.

I just want to ask… why does this become such as fear? We are born single and we are single before we are married. And, while there may be lonely times, while we are single, marriage is not much different. Just because you are married to someone doesn’t mean that you are not an individual or a single entity.

Basically, whether we have a boyfriend, girlfriend are married, widowed or whatever… we are always single. Not being so also means that you have a certain level of dependence on the other half, and that is so not healthy. Actually, that’s the main factor that leads to psychological or physical abuse.

So, for all you married people, welcome to realizing that even though someone is sleeping in your bed legally, you are still single too. And, for all of us going through hard times, it’s time to embrace our whole self, by ourselves and with all the power that we’ve got inside.

Happy single soul searching!

Brooke Hart wrote this on June 6th, 2008 and filed it under Single Life |