Fear is one of life’s strongest hold backs for most of us. It can keep us from accomplishing our goals, fulfilling our dreams, and even from finding the true love that we crave in our hearts. Fear is an incredibly strong and crippling emotion that many people deal with on a regular basis. For some, fear is even what is keeping them single and unattached. Sometimes, it can even keep them from close friendships and other relationships. They are being robbed of life’s most spectacular joys by that great thief…fear.
This fear that has the person in its clutches may have come from several sources, or one in particular. It is usually a life experience that has taught them to not trust and to question everything with a negative, or “cup half empty”, mindset. Often, the experience can be related all the way back to childhood. Maybe the family home was a place where love was not to be found. Maybe they saw one event that stuck in their mind well into adulthood and gave them a poor perspective of what love is.
Even if nothing happened during their young life, a person might be afraid to give their heart if it has been broken and let down in the past. A man or woman who has been cheated on in a former relationship will often shy away from giving their heart to another person, for fear that the same thing will happen and they will be left to clean up the pieces of their shattered heart once again. That is an extraordinarily difficult thing to go through and it can stay with someone for a very long time to come. It leaves the person who has been cheated on with so many insecurities and questions that usually have no good answers.
When we’ve been hurt by what we thought was love, it is completely natural to withdraw from the possibility of leaving ourselves exposed to that pain again. Initially, it is even healthy, so that we can heal and recover from the offense properly. Otherwise, we may take that pain and anger into the next relationship we are involved in and end up hurting our new partner, as we have been hurt. That is not what we intend to do, but it happens.
If, however, an appropriate time has passed and you are still single out of nothing more than fear, you have entered an area that is probably unhealthy at best. By allowing your fears to control your chances at love, you are missing out on something so wonderful. We are all created to love and to be loved. Fears are hard to set aside, but if you want to live a truly fulfilling and worthwhile life, you must do all that you can to do just that. Let the fear go and live your life, in happiness and in love.